Paris Hilton

OK, I'll start this. Ms. Hilton leaves me absolutely cold. She drives around with her little dog in her Bentley, spends huge amounts of cash, minces on the red carpet, and apes for the paparazzi without any panties. What in hell does she do that is worthwhile except spend money and generate press.

I start off with Ms. Hilton as a nominee for the 2010 Total Lack of Human Value Award.

Nominations Now Open

Make your nominations now for the 2010 Lack of Human Value Awards, an award created to recognize those people in our society who exist primarily for their own benefit, seek their own publicity and popularity, who indulge their selfish fantasies, and generate little or nothing of value to improve the human condition.

These awards will never recognize politicians of any party; they are their own worst enemies. No, these awards are designed to recognize those super-wealthy social elites who are congenitally wealthy but do virtually nothing except live for their own pleasure.

You surely have an idea who some of these folks are. Make your nominations by January 31, and we'll announce the awards in early February.